YOUR QUESTION. A CLEARER NEXT STEP.
How to Encourage Your Child to Make Eye Contact
Encourage eye contact gently by making your face rewarding to look at — get to your child's level, bring toys near your eyes, use anticipation songs, follow their interest, and celebrate natural glances rather than commanding 'look at me'. Some children take longer, and a developmental check can lovingly explore this. AbilityScore® is part of Pinnacle’s developmental assessment. Diagnosis, where needed, requires an appropriately qualified healthcare professional.
In this answer 5 sections
Eye contact isn't a rule to enforce — it's a connection that grows when your child feels safe, delighted and met where they are.
In short
The gentlest way to encourage eye contact is to make your face the most rewarding thing to look at — through play, songs, and warm back-and-forth moments, never by forcing or repeatedly saying "look at me". Get down to your child's eye level, hold up favourite toys near your face, and celebrate the natural glances that happen during fun. For some children, comfortable eye contact takes longer to develop, and that's something a developmental check can lovingly explore — not something to pressure away.
Everyday ways to build it
- Get to their level — sit or lie face-to-face so your eyes are easy to find. Looming over a child makes eye contact harder, not easier.
- Bring toys to your face — hold a bubble wand, a favourite car or a peek-a-boo cloth up beside your eyes, so looking at the toy means looking near you.
- Use songs and rhymes with anticipation — "Round and round the garden…" or "Row, row, row your boat" build a pause where children naturally look up at you for the next exciting bit.
- Follow their interest — narrate and join whatever they're already enjoying. Shared attention on a toy is the foundation eye contact grows from.
- Reward, don't demand — when a glance happens, light up: smile, react, make the fun continue. Avoid commanding "look at me", which can feel stressful and reduce contact.
- Respect their comfort — some children connect better with brief, side-on glances. Honour that; connection matters more than a fixed stare.
When a developmental check helps
Eye contact develops differently for every child. A friendly developmental check is worth booking if your child rarely looks to share enjoyment, doesn't respond to their name by around 12 months, isn't pointing to show you things by around 18 months, or if eye contact is paired with delays in babbling, gestures or first words. This isn't about labelling — it's about understanding your child's communication strengths early, when gentle support helps most.
The Pinnacle way
AbilityScore® is part of Pinnacle’s developmental assessment. Diagnosis, where needed, requires an appropriately qualified healthcare professional — never from an app or checklist. Our therapists build eye contact through play-based speech and language therapy that strengthens the whole foundation of communication, guided by a precise developmental profile. Explore more ways we support families and child development.
Trusted sources
American Academy of Pediatrics (HealthyChildren.org) guidance on early social communication and developmental milestones; American Speech-Language-Hearing Association resources on joint attention and early communication; CDC milestone guidance on responding, sharing and looking.
Next step — Want playful, expert ways to grow your child's connection? Book a developmental check with a Pinnacle clinician.
This is general information, not a diagnosis — individual assessment and diagnosis require an appropriately qualified healthcare professional.
CONNECT THE ANSWER TO YOUR CHILD’S DAY
Something to notice. Something to discuss.
What to notice
Watch if your child rarely looks to share enjoyment, doesn't respond to their name by around 12 months, isn't pointing to show you things by around 18 months, or if limited eye contact comes alongside delays in babbling, gestures or first words.
In everyday life
During play, hold a favourite toy or bubble wand up beside your eyes — when your child looks, light up with a big smile and keep the fun going, so looking at you always means more joy.
Bring your observations and questions to your child’s professional. Choose activities that suit your child’s comfort, abilities and agreed plan.
Bring your questions to a first visitQuestions families ask
Should I tell my child to 'look at me' to get eye contact?
It's better not to. Commanding eye contact can feel stressful and often reduces it. Instead, make your face rewarding to look at — bring toys near your eyes, use playful anticipation, and celebrate the glances that happen naturally during fun.
Is it normal for my child to avoid eye contact sometimes?
Yes — eye contact varies a lot between children and across moments. Some children connect with brief or side-on glances. What matters is overall connection. If limited eye contact comes alongside delays in name response, pointing or first words, a friendly developmental check is worthwhile.
At what age should my child make eye contact?
Babies often begin sharing gaze in the early months, and by around 9–12 months most children look to share enjoyment and respond to their name. Every child is different, so a developmental check helps if you're unsure about your child's social communication.
FOLLOW THE SOURCE
References behind this answer.
- Organisation website · further readingAAP HealthyChildren.org — early social communication and milestones
- Organisation website · further readingASHA — joint attention and early communication
- Organisation website · further readingCDC — developmental milestones: responding and sharing
References are supplied with this answer. An organisation homepage offers further reading; it does not establish an independent review of this page.
Content attribution: SETU Consortium · Pinnacle Blooms Network.
PEOPLE, TOPICS & DEVELOPMENT
See the connections.
Browse the wider question collections connected with this answer’s audience, developmental area and stage.
FROM UNDERSTANDING TO PURPOSEFUL SUPPORT
One question. Your child’s whole life.
Your child’s self-sufficient, mainstream-included life is the purpose from the beginning. At Pinnacle, that purpose shapes what we understand, the goals we choose, the people we bring together, everyday practice and review.
Connect this question with the right support.
Start with your child’s strengths, your observations and what you want everyday life to become.
Make the next conversation useful.
Bring the situations you notice at home or school. We’ll explain a suitable service, centre and first visit, including availability and fees, before you decide.
How PinnacleAI® connects the journeyExplore the seven stages
- 1Understand abilities
A starting picture of your child’s capabilities.
- 2Choose meaningful goals
Readiness and a plan shaped around the child.
- 3Bring the right support together
Suitable therapies and people for those goals.
- 4Carry practice into everyday life
Guidance for family, home and school.
- 5Track and correct
Use observations to adjust the plan.
- 6Reassess and review
Decide what to continue, change or do next.
- 7Grow independence and participation
The child’s life gives each step its purpose.
Explore the whole PinnacleAI® system → · Participation at school and in the community →
PINNACLE’S EVIDENCE, OPEN TO YOU
Look at the evidence behind our work.
Read our research, inspect the original regulatory documents and check what each institutional measure means.
General information supports a conversation with an appropriately qualified professional. Advice, goals and support depend on the individual child.